#1 Memories

“Body is just a shelter for the soul. Functional matter. Nothing to be obsessed with. Obsessed with something else, says the body. For example, be extremely obsessed with memories. If you have time, write down every single thing.” – Lala Bohang

Your mind goes back to the times a few years ago. As a girl with spirit filled even during school hours has ended, there is still a sense of your spirit to the next activity. With friends with the shy smile come watch the basketball competition on one of the city's elite, cheer but not clear and it sounded just follow the other.

Arrived in your house when the day was night, then because when it is a Saturday night so no one wants a repeat of the lesson from their school at that day just as much as you. You put the laptop before you, then turn it on, and started to update the status on twitter then your check your inbox of direct message, you found one message there, apparently from a senior who is quite popular among you. "I see you among of spectator today, that is you, huh?" and you remember that he also was in the that place last evening.

Or go back to memory when other senior that his handsomeness get the recognition of one school or at least all the girls admit it, suddenly sends a message, "don't make me fall in love" and some time later he date with your best friends.

Or go back to memory when other senior again, yeah, this is still about of senior that is always eagerly awaited on the basketball court, he's one exam room with you and after the exam, he sent a direct message, "Hey! It looks like there is something special in your face, I feel so happy to sit the exam, thanks ya!" and then today it just pass you.

Or back into memory when someone makes you comfortable in a chat with him, while he only as fugitives because your love ones are ignored by someone and you stalk his social media and in the end you ilfeel it.

Or go back to memory when someone bought you chocolate, you think it is not because valentine's day, but since then the chocolate into a lot of discounts and he bought it for you but you found a letter with one sentence that say that you are like the opium for him. In other day even now when you guys chat together he never discusses his feelings at all, as if he was just enjoying long chats with you, it doesn't matter whether you like him or not.

Or go back to memory when someone invite you to go to a place and you are advised to go with the others because you are busy, then he replied, "thinking about if there are other people, why should I bother to invite you?" and you created a confused and feeling guilty for the answers that you get from him.

Or go back to memory when someone asks you, "where to vacation?" you answer it, "At my village, of course. Why?" and he replied back, "so if anyone's looking for you, I can answer." Then you ask again, "who's gonna find me?" he replied, "I am." And there's a smile full of silliness left in there, certainly left a message from him and a strange smile while you're on top of your bed while your eyes keep staring at the phone. Huh?

Or back to the memory when in a class you are said, "I love this lesson." And he whispered "But, I like you." And a friend next to him said, "It's not unheard by her!" and it makes you laugh in the heart remembers what happened the last time some of you, that he's willing to help and to share everything with you. Time, vehicles, food, beverages, vitamins, and other unexpected things. But, you guys still be friends because it would be better if the friends, you can still enjoy the time together, at least until one among you guys get hurt. Yeah, the boy only comes once, said something that made you fly but not fall, and he even left you or will never come back. But, you always enjoy messages and that moment, messages and moments later you will soon delete it because it's just junk or something of similar nonsense.

Arrived at the time you never opened your twitter social media until one day you get your direct message was filled with messages from someone who every year on your birthday date is always sending messages. It is like when every someone left you, it originally contained regrets however the longer always contain a prayer for you, sweet. One of the messages that you remember most of the length of the direct message that was sent, he told you to be flowers on the edge of a cliff, not into flowers at the edge of the road, because the flowers at the edge of the road more easily picked the guy, then you have to be a flower that grows in the edge of a cliff where to pick it takes struggle, you're worth fighting for.

Arrived at the time you feel that you are still someone you are waiting for, rethink how you feel if his parents are still asking how are you? Who is a man or anyone with you on the beach last afternoon? Or are they always tell you when they come visiting your town? Or are they always send you photos, videos, and any other thing about him? Or are they always say in front of their friends that you will be a part of their family members? While you guys have not mutually attracted.

Arrived in time there is someone who is extremely obsessed with you. He stalks all your social media, find out many things about yourselves, even he knows all men are likely to be a rival to be with you. Although ever he laughed to you because he knows you will not choose anyone, he laughed to you because you would always prefer to be alone than to make the moment with people who will probably forget. Arrived at the time you wish to remove yourself, but someone more used to search and found you. You finally failed to disappear. You survive. And you know not all moment had a sense of the moment, sometimes also get such an email, dm, and the messages, they are garbage, and need to be discarded.

Arrived at the time you remain there and someone came in, while you absolutely do not want to spend your time to be with him because you survive for something else. Not all who came then made you regret, among them come to enjoy happiness. It is not clear, you guys are not clear. You guys understand each other, you guys are sharing with each other, you guys are friends, and you guys are happy because there will not be injured.

Sweet messages always you get it, so does help and wholehearted thanks. Sometimes you are talking to him but someone long passed, one that is resemble to someone, a person who gives you a deep impression on the last meeting you guys and makes you can't forget it. In the end you choose to enjoy what you do, smile at what you receive, and hold fast to the principle because you always want to be a better person from day to day, time to time, even though you know how difficult it is.

“We choose what controls us, we choose what will happen, we choose what we do, we choose what we are thankful for, we choose our day, we choose what we are sad about, we choose what we hate, we choose what we love, we choose our own sufferings, we choose our own beliefs. Save yourself. Choose to believe in nothing. Choose void.” – Lala Bohang